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THE FUNNIESHumor, The Best Way To Start The Day So you think you look like...
PEANUTS Launches Year-Long 60th Anniversary Celebrations with the First Official PEANUTS Look-a-Like Contest!With Inspiration from a Gallery of Celebrity Peanuts Look-a-Likes — Including Will Ferrell, Simon Pegg, Tina Fey and Whoopi Goldberg — Fans Can Enter Photos of Themselves or Their Kids Contest Judges Include Jill Schulz, Garth Brooks, Trisha Yearwood, “Supernanny” Jo Frost, Nigel Barker and Victoria Recaño In a Contest Benefiting the Boys & Girls Clubs of America, Entrants Compete for Family Adventure to Cedar Point, Home of Planet Snoopy Pig Latin 101 = igpay atinlay 011ayLesson 2 Get Lost Punk = etgay ostlay unkpay Lesson 3 No More Dow = onay oremay owday Lesson 4 Sign language lessons below = ignsay anguagelay essonslay elowbay
Cough Syrup The owner of this drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily from Road Runner Children under 18, do not go past this line, this is a child safe web site!
Subject: Top 36 Things You'll Never Hear From a Southerner :
36.I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex. from Hill Climber
Are you a True Democrat, Republican, or Southerner?Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, and raises the knife and charges at you. You are carrying a .40 cal. Glock, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.. What do you do? Democrat's Answer: "Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor? Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? What does the law say about this situation? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a 'Paint and Weed Day' and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior!" Republican's Answer: BANG! Southerner's Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click.... (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hydra-shock hollow points?" Son: "Can I shoot the next one!?" Wife: "You Ain't Taking That To The Taxidermist! " ...................... Who is your real friend?
This really works...!Try this experiment.Put your dog and your spouse in the trunk of the car for an hour. When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you?
Calling an illegal alien an 'undocumented immigrant' is like calling a drug dealer an unlicensed pharmacist ADVANCES IN MEDICINE....AMAZINGA French doctor says 'Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.' A German doctor says 'That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks. The Russian doctor says 'In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.' An American doctor, not to be outdone, says 'You guys are way behind. We recently took a man with no brains out of Illinois , put him in the White House , and now half the country is looking for work.' |
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